My Family and My Home
Primary 3 · Social and Religious Studies
My Family and My Home
Lesson 1 of 3
13 min
Let's begin
“Bring a picture of your whole family on Monday,” says the P3 teacher.
On Monday, Keza holds up a picture of four people. Mugisha holds up a picture of nine. The class starts to laugh, and Keza hides her paper under the desk.
“Nobody drew the wrong picture,” says the teacher quietly. “Families are not all the same size, and not one of you has a family that is less of a family.”
Today you will find out what she meant — and what each person in a home actually does.
Look at Keza’s home. Her mother wakes her. Her father pays her school fees. Somebody cooks her ubugali. When Keza has malaria, somebody sits by her bed at night.
Now look at Ishimwe’s home. Ishimwe has no mother and no father — they died when he was small. His aunt Umutoni wakes him. Aunt Umutoni pays his school fees. She cooks for him and she sits by his bed when he is sick.
The names are different. The caring is exactly the same.
A family is the people who live with you, care for you, and belong to you.
So a family is not counted by how many heads you can draw. It is counted by the caring.
Walk down one street in your umudugudu and knock on three doors.
Door 1 — the Byiringiro home. Inside are a mother, a father and their three children. Nobody else lives there. A home with parents and their own children only is called a nuclear family. (Think: a small tight bunch, like the inside of a bean.)
Door 2 — the Mugisha home. Inside are a mother, a father, four children, a grandmother, an uncle and two cousins. Nine people, one pot of beans. When the family circle stretches out to hold grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins, we call it an extended family. (Think: extended = stretched wider.)
Door 3 — the Uwase home. Inside are Uwase, her little brother, and their mother. Their father died two years ago. A home where one parent is raising the children alone is called a single-parent family.
There are other shapes too. Some children live with a guardian — an aunt, a grandmother or a kind uncle who is not their parent but who feeds them, pays for school and loves them. All of these are real, whole, proper families.
So never laugh at a friend’s family picture. Their family holds them just as tightly as yours holds you.
A family is a team, and in a good team everybody carries something. Let us go inside the Mugisha home and give each person their job. Watch how we do it step by step.
Step 1 — Who brings what the family needs? Mugisha’s father grows beans and sells them at the market. His mother sews clothes and is paid for them. Their money buys food, soap, uniforms and school fees. These two are the providers. They also decide the rules of the house, so we say they are the parents and leaders of the home.
Step 2 — Who cares for the small ones and the sick? Grandmother Mukamana no longer digs. She stays at home, watches the baby, stirs the pot and tells stories at night. She is the carer — and, because she has lived the longest, she is also the adviser. When there is a quarrel, everybody listens to her.
Step 3 — Who is learning and helping? Mugisha is 8. Uncle Gatete goes out to work, but Mugisha goes to school. His work is to learn. At home he sweeps the compound, fetches a small jerrycan of water and holds the baby while grandmother cooks.
So is Mugisha useless because he is a child? Not at all. Take his sweeping away for one week and see what the compound looks like! A child’s job is to learn, help and respect — and that job matters.
Mugisha’s mother has one sister, Aunt Umutoni. Aunt Umutoni has a son called Habimana, who is exactly Mugisha’s age.
Is Habimana Mugisha’s brother? Work it out in two little steps.
So Habimana is Mugisha’s cousin, not his brother — because a brother must share the same mother and father as you. Being the same age and playing the same games does not make you brothers. Sharing your parents does.
Tip
How to remember it. Say the word to yourself: ex-tended means stretched wider — grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins are all inside the stretch. A nuclear family is the small tight bunch: parents and their children only.
And for roles, ask three questions about any home: Who provides? Who cares? Who learns and helps? If you can answer those three, you understand that family.
Think first, then tap Show answer to check.
Keza lives with her mother, her father and her two brothers. Nobody else lives in the house. What kind of family is this?
Answer: A nuclear family — only parents and their own children. It is not extended, because no grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins live there.
Niyonzima lives with his grandfather, his aunt, his mother and three cousins. What kind of family is this?
Answer: An extended family. The circle has stretched past the parents and children to hold grandparents, an aunt and cousins.
Uwase’s father sells tomatoes at the market. Her mother is a nurse at the health centre. Her grandmother stays home and minds the baby. Uwase is 8. What is Uwase’s role in this family?
Answer: To go to school and learn, to help with the chores, and to respect the older people at home. She is not a provider — that is her parents’ work — but she is not useless either. Her sweeping and her homework are her real jobs.
Mutesi’s father has a brother called Gatete. Gatete has a daughter called Ineza. What is Ineza to Mutesi?
Answer: Her cousin. Step 1: Gatete is her father’s brother, so he is her uncle. Step 2: Ineza is that uncle’s daughter, and an uncle’s child is your cousin.
Ishimwe’s classmate says, “You have no father, so you have no real family.” Is the classmate right?
Answer: No. Ishimwe lives with his aunt, who feeds him, pays his school fees and cares for him when he is ill. That is caring, and caring is what makes a family. The classmate is not only wrong — he is unkind.
What you learned today
Quick check
Match each kind of family to who lives in it.
Tap one on the left, then its partner on the right.