Decision-Making Regarding Sexual Relationships
Senior 1 · Biology
Decision-Making Regarding Sexual Relationships
Lesson 1 of 5
25 min
On the way home from school, some older students tease Kalisa: "You've never had a girlfriend? At your age? A real man..." Later, a video on a phone tells him that "nothing happens the first time". At a party, someone offers him a drink "to relax".
None of these moments is a decision in itself, but together they push. In this unit you will learn how to recognise that push, what the facts really are, and how to make decisions that protect your health, your education and your future. This lesson looks at the barriers: the things that make safe choices harder.
Definition
Sexual health: physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality, including freedom from disease, unplanned pregnancy, violence and pressure (based on the WHO's description).
Barrier (to safe sexual health): anything that makes it harder for a person to make or carry out a safe decision, such as pressure from others, alcohol, or wrong information.
Figure 1: Barriers to safe sexual health (red) and the protective factors that balance them (green).
Friends matter a lot in adolescence, and most peer influence is good: friends help each other study, play sport and stay out of trouble. But peers can also push each other towards risk. Researchers in Rwanda (2022) found that some young people spread messages such as "a real boy has sex with many girls" or "you're not a real girl until you lose your virginity", even though these go against what families expect and are not true.
Definition
Peer pressure: the influence that people of your own age group have on what you think and do. It can be direct (someone tells you to do something) or indirect (you feel you must copy what others seem to be doing).
You learned in Unit 12 that alcohol and cannabis slow reactions and weaken judgement. After drinking, people are more likely to do things they had decided not to do, less able to refuse, and less able to protect themselves. The WHO lists the harmful use of alcohol or drugs as one of the behaviours that increase the risk of getting HIV. Some people who want to abuse a young person give them alcohol first for exactly this reason.
Many young people get their information about sex from friends, social media and videos, and much of it is wrong. Wrong information leads to wrong decisions.
| Myth | Fact |
|---|---|
| "A girl cannot get pregnant the first time she has sex." | She can. Pregnancy is possible whenever a sperm can reach an egg, whether or not it is the first time. |
| "You can tell by looking whether someone has HIV or another STI." | You cannot. Many people with an STI, or in the first years of HIV, have no signs at all; only a test can tell. |
| "Everyone my age is having sex." | Untrue. Many young people choose to wait, and those who boast are often exaggerating. |
| "A real man proves himself with many partners." | This is a stereotype. Respect, responsibility and self-control are signs of maturity; more partners means more risk of infection. |
| "Alcohol helps you relax and make better decisions." | Alcohol weakens judgement and makes unsafe decisions more likely. |
| "HIV can be caught by sharing food, hugging or mosquito bites." | False. HIV is not spread by ordinary daily contact. |
Definition
Misinformation: false or inaccurate information, whether spread by mistake or on purpose. Myth: a widely believed idea that is not true.
Some older people offer young people money, phone credit, lifts, clothes or school fees and expect a sexual relationship in return. This is called transactional sex, and it is one of the most serious barriers. Because it involves children and a misuse of power, it is the subject of the next lesson.
Worked example 1: spotting the barrier
Name the barrier in each situation and give one safer response.
| Situation | Barrier | Safer response |
|---|---|---|
| Friends laugh at Mutesi because she "has no boyfriend". | peer pressure (direct) | "I'm happy as I am." Spend time with friends who respect her choice. |
| Kalisa reads online that "nothing happens the first time". | misinformation | Check with a reliable source: a teacher, a health worker, a science textbook. |
| At a party, a friend keeps refilling Gatete's cup. | alcohol | Refuse alcohol; stay with trusted friends; leave early. |
| A shopkeeper gives Ishimwe free phone credit and asks her to visit him alone. | transactional sex / abuse of power | Refuse the gifts, stay away, and tell a trusted adult. |
Worked example 2: testing a claim
A classmate says: "My cousin says you can't get HIV if the person looks healthy." Test the claim using three questions.
Conclusion: the claim is a myth. Health decisions should be based on reliable sources such as health workers, teachers and official health organisations.
In groups, choose one myth from the table (or one you have heard; you do not need to say where) and design a short message, a poster slogan or a two-line sketch, that corrects it for pupils in Senior 1. Share your messages with the class.
Warning
Watch out for "everyone". When someone says "everyone is doing it", ask: who exactly? Pressure works by making a choice seem normal. Most people your age are not doing what the boasters claim.
Tip
Memory hook: the "PAMT" barriers. Peers, Alcohol and drugs, Myths, Transactional sex. Balance them with knowledge, trusted adults, clear goals and good friends.
Practice: barriers to safe sexual health
Key points
Sources and credits
Written by Ganzaa: the lesson text, Figure 1, the tables, the worked examples, the discussion and the practice questions.
